Sunday, June 26, 2011

Breaking News

(This is also re-post from my frienster blog, original date is Jannuary 4, 2009. This is just a joke :D)

Dimuel and Batumbakal were best friends. They’re both in Batumbakal’s house watching their favorite show waiting for the New Year to come. 11:50pm of Dec 31, a breaking news interrupted their favorite show.

“Good evening everybody, I mean not really good evening. I’m Kim A. Tayan. We interrupt our scheduled program to air a horrifying news. NASA broadcasted a while ago that their satellites have spotted a great comet heading towards the Earth. The Comet is estimated to hit the Earth in about ten minutes from now. Astronomers believe that the said comet is huge enough to destroy the world!”

After the broadcast, their favorite show was restored and Dimuel panicked…

Dimuel: Oh my God! Oh my God! What do we do?

Batumbakal: Calm down, don’t be stupid!

Dimuel: How do I do that?!

Batumbakal: Just don’t be yourself… Just do whatever you want while you still have time so you’ll die happy when the comet hits.

Dimuel: Uh… I just can’t think of anything I want to do right now. All I know is I don’t want to die being crushed by a comet.

Upon hearing what Dimuel said, Batumbakal quickly grab a knife and stabbed Dimuel at the heart.

Dimuel: W-why did you do that?

Batumbakal: Well, you said you don’t want to die being crushed by a comet and I think it’s more painful to die that way and feel the explosion of the world than being stabbed by a knife so I decided to do that.

Dimuel: Thank you, you really are my best friend

Just when Dimuel can hardly open his eyes and is about to die, their favorite show was once again interruped with a breaking news. “It’s a false alarm! Another comet hits the comet that were supposed to hit the Earth. Pieces of comets scattered and it both changed direction. None of the comets were heading towards the Earth so the world is now safe. I repeat, it’s a false alarm! This is Kim A. Tayan saying good night everybody and a Happy New Year!”

Vending Machine

(This is a re-post of my friendster blog. This is back in September 2009.)


If you think that all vending machines are just the same, you are wrong there. There’s a vending machine near the City Food Court (A fast food) in Batha, Riyadh, Saudi Arabia that knows how to mock its customer. As in you will really wonder when you use it. You might even use logic. Like me, who even use my logic on figuring out how that vending machine works.

September 6, 2009. It was past 6:45 PM when I and my family went to Batha. Because it was almost night, we were hungry so we decided to buy food in the City Food Court. I told my mom to buy me a jumbo shawarma (Turkish food) and she asked what drinks I would like to buy. But because the drinks that are available in the City Food Court are just pepsi and mirinda citrus and I saw a vending machine nearby, I told my mom not to buy a drink for me and decided to buy a drink from the vending machine.

The vending machines have two rows of choices. On the bottom row, from left to right, the choices are pepsi diet, shani, mirinda apple, mirinda strawberry and mirinda orange. I don’t remember the choices on the top row since there are too many drinks for me to remember.

Hmm... shani, long time, no taste. I was about to choose it when I saw mirinda strawberry that tempted me to buy it. It’s not always available in the store that I always go to and I only have tasted it once so I decided to buy it instead.

I pressed the button for mirinda strawberry and I heard a thud from the inside of the vending machine which means it’s already out and ready to be picked up. But when I took it, I was surprised that it was a mirinda apple that came out of the vending machine.

So it got me thinking, “I pressed the mirinda strawberry button but why this one came out? Did I pressed the wrong button? I’m sure I didn’t.”

But because you can’t complain on a vending machine, I didn’t complain and just accept the mirinda apple.  I just told myself that mirinda apple is good too.

Finally, our order was done. So we took it and went away from the City Food Court. We transfer to a different building. There it seems like my father was waiting for something and my mother went somewhere. So we sat on a bench and ate our shawarma and jumbo shawarma.

I wasn’t done eating my jumbo shawarma yet when my mother came back and my father asked if we want to go buy grocery with them. Because I don’t want to walk while eating, I told them that I would just wait for them on the bench. My elder brother decided to stay with me.

My brother already finished his food and drinks while my jumbo shamarwa is still half and my miranda apple is still half-full. Later on, my brother asked me to buy drinks with him but I told him that I’m going to finish my food first.

Because of that, he decided to buy a drink alone. He told me that he’ll just come back. I told him that there’s a vending machine near the City Food Court and because I can see it from where I stand, I point it out for him and he leaves immediately.

Later on, he came back drinking a can of shani in his hand that made me envious. So when he came close to me, I immediately spoke to him. “I was supposed to buy that… But I saw mirinda strawberry. I chose it, this came out” I raised the can of mirinda apple in my right hand when he suddenly replied “I chose that, this came out”. “Huh? Really?” I asked in an instant. I thought he was just kidding me at first but he looks so serious. He also said “Try it.” so I believed him.

At that time, my mirinda apple is already empty and I’m envious of my brother’s shani so I asked him to accompany me to the vending machine to buy a drink.
I decided that when we get there, I will choose mirinda apple so a shani will come out. But when we got there, I was once again tempted by mirinda strawberry. Oh the temptation, I can’t resist it hahaha! So once again, I changed my mind. I want mirinda strawberry again.

I inserted one riyal on the vending machine and said to myself “wait, maybe a different one will come out. This calls for operation logic”. I was really determined to get a mirinda strawberry; the temptation is just that much. XD

So then I told my brother “Maybe a different one will come out. If mirinda apple which is at the left side of mirinda strawberry came out when I chose mirinda strawberry and shani which is at the left side of mirinda apple came out when you chose mirinda apple, that means if I chose mirinda orange, mirinda strawberry will come out as it is at the left side of mirinda orange.” “Maybe” my brother answered.
Because that’s what I learn in logic, I was certain that it will happen. So I pressed the mirinda orange button and I heard a thud again from the vending machine which means it’s already out. My eyes grew big when I saw that mirinda orange also came out. My brother burst into laughter when he saw that while I can’t even laugh because I’m the one who’s going to drink it.

But like they say, there’s always a bright side. So what’s the good, the bad and the ugly?
The good or the bright side is at least I got a drink.
The bad is it’s not the drink that I wanted.
The ugly is me hahaha! That’s a joke! You see you laugh there, that means it really is a joke. Don’t say you didn’t. L